The End

The end does not mean the closure of everything that was. It means the non-existence of anything as good or as bad henceforth. The end of anything good brings sadness while the end of anything bad is always welcomed. But it is not necessary that all good things should have good endings.

School years, college years, first job, rented house and finally life, all come to an end. And among all these beautiful happenings those that do end are, unfortunately, a few relations. Relationships get accumulated over the years. It is up to each individual how many they carry forth into the dusk of their lives and how many part ways, way before. Any relationship requires care, nurturing and love. But above all, it requires respect. Any relationship lacking respect will eventually turn sour, leading to fights, misunderstandings and neglect.

It is often said that people give multiple second chances to those they love. But how many chances is a person worth? A mother would be willing to forgive her child forever, even if the child is cruel to her. It is a mother’s love, unquestionable, irreplaceable. That cannot happen with every other relationship. When the hurt is past endurance, it is a sign for the relation to end.

The decision is always tough. But it is better to live with your self-respect than with a relationship which gives you none. Friends, cousins, family, business acquaintances, etc., all are ties one is tied to. However insignificant they may seem, their ending does bring immense sadness. While ending any relation, it is important to understand what went wrong. Contemplation sorts matters out and gives peace of mind. It paves way for forgiveness to be given.

Forgiveness shouldn't be another form of granting an undeserving person their umpteenth chance at redemption. However hurt and depressed one may be it should be understood that there do exist certain people who feel no guilt whatsoever. A chance offered to them is their opportunity to start tormenting an already pained mind, all over again! To dispense off with such relationships is healthy for the mind.

At the end, all living lives burdened by pained and abused relationships must realise that letting go of the relationship does not mean burying even the good memories. The beautiful times shared should always be cherished and kept alive in the heart. From the end arises a new beginning: a life of respect sprinkled with joys from the past!

The End.

Love

Is love a mere illusion or an extended state of happiness yearned by the solitary mind longing for companionship from similarly equipped minds? The notion of love arises from the need for acceptance among the societal elements. Forced or otherwise, wedlock for most is the respectable place to look for love. Sometimes it exists and majorly is believed to exist. So what, is love? A chiseled body with perfect display of the sinews and bountiful blessing of fat are supposedly the prerequisites for love to blossom. This blossom grows into a beautiful flower and one day will have to wilt and fall to only be replaced with another blossom! If nature's nature is to change over time, then is love not party to this change? Then what is love? Lust is love. If it weren't, then why would lust ever make room in the minds of those in 'love'? Physical attributes and mental intelligence are polar opposites. It is only fair to want both in the desired lover. It is not considered love by most if physical attributes are the basis for attraction, for they change over time. But is it love if the all-knowing mind changes? To love someone's mind is more dangerous than loving them for their looks. The mind changes every smallest unit of time. Technically, so does love. Now, what is love? How is it pure representation of the heart's truest emotion if it is only imagined, as in the case of forced marriages? What is the measure of the purity of love if it acquires a new flavour at the sight of every new person? How can love be unending if it is different every instant? So, isn't love a mere illusion, in the hope to fulfill the heart's desires of being wanted?

Reasons to be a Theist

There is this continuous battle of words going on in the world at large and sometimes within our own minds – does there really exist a God? This is a subject which can be debated upon endlessly for there is no answer to it. There is no proof that God exists, yet no reason to believe He does not.

According to Wikipedia, God is most often conceived of as the supernatural creator and overseer of the universe. This is perhaps the basic definition every religion gives of God, which forms the basis of my first reason to be a theist. Whether or not we like it, all of us are born into one of the many religions that exist. Our thinking, our personality, outlook towards life and our very being is centered on our beliefs about God. Hence, having faith in God becomes inevitable.

Moving to other reasons, we humans love to question and hence could argue that evolution theories show how life came into being, dismissing the need for any God. The big bang theory, the chemical evolution of life, etc. give scientific explanations. But there remain many unanswered questions like ‘why’ it all happens? Science explains only observable and measurable phenomena. This shows that a greater power exists, which theists term God.

Theists attribute many qualities to God. Regardless of people accepting His existence, the concept of his being ensures harmony and peace. Else, there would be dictators cropping up, wanting to take control of all. There would be discord world over, for there would be no fear of having to pay for all the sins. Humility would never exist in people’s hearts for they would have no one to show gratitude for what they have been blessed with. Without the notion that God made mankind, there would be no respect for others in our minds. Belief in God gives people a reason to wish for a miracle to transform their lives when every hope is lost.

In today’s fast paced life, what happens today is forgotten by tomorrow. Memories and gestures, both good and bad are extremely short lived. It is easy to forget that we aren’t the only ones with a right to live. Everyone is accountable for their actions, especially to God. Taking words from a religious scripture, “The ultimate objective of a living being is to attain God.” There is a supreme power controlling us and guiding us and this, is God.

May God be with all.

They Call Out In Our Dreams...

“You think the dead we have loved ever truly leave us? ........ You did see your father last night, Harry … you found him inside yourself.” –Albus Dumbledore

Death of a loved one is sorrow unimaginably deep. Try as we might, it cannot be forgotten. It only lessens with time. Shock unsettles you and grief settles in. You cannot move, you cannot breathe, you cannot think. Yet, all you do is think! The hours awake and the hours asleep, you think. All you want is for them to return. 

You curse them for abandoning you. You shout at them, you cry your eyes out! You wish death would take you away too. You wish it were all a bad dream and the next moment you will wake up to find your life returned to normalcy. But life, or rather death, works differently. As Prof. Dumbledore rightly says, our loved ones never truly leave us. They love us even in their death. And it is they who show us a way to move on in life.

It is believed that dreams are the reflections of the subconscious mind. It is a matter of perspective what meaning we wish to assign to those dreams. The dreams of those who have suffered the loss of loved ones tend to revolve only around them. Various happy memories get replayed, old forgotten times are remembered. Eventually the dreams become the only place to see the dead alive and lively. Do these dreams only originate because we are in constant thought of the dead? Or do these dreams have deeper meaning?

The grieving for the dead truly starts after their last physical remains no longer remain. They haven’t fully departed until we let them go. They are bound to the mortal world, trapped in our saddened minds till we learn to lead a life without them. They are patient. They are caring. They help us cross the thorny paths of life without hurting ourselves. They are with us and within, making us strong from the inside. They make their presence felt for they call out in our dreams. 

Colourful, vivid dreams, so close to reality, keep frequenting tired and lonely minds. Few are instances from the past; others show how much they loved us! Those point out the happiness that was shared during life. They give a sense of satisfaction of being with those close to our heart, if not by daylight, at least when asleep. Few others make us wander around mazes, losing them and finding them, resembling a game of hide and seek. They give us the strength to face life, alone. Yet others would show the dead leading a happy life elsewhere. All these are dreams shown to us by our long gone loved ones. 

Slowly the dreams become less discernible. They appear less often. Newer dreams concerning other issues appear. Our grief reduces. We start leading our life, which we considered impossible without them. Someday, finally, consciously and unconsciously we accept the void death created in our lives. It is now that our loved ones can depart. They depart having been with us through our misery. They depart having fulfilled their responsibility towards us. They depart, filling us with love, humility and care for all that exists in our lives.

Love knows no death. It lives on even when those we loved have been snatched away. Not just in our hearts, but in theirs too. They will visit again, when we are least expecting it. They will give us reason to smile in our sleep, having hugged them again, having loved them again. They will be in our hearts always for they call out in our dreams.

The No Help Helpline

How many of us see a child playing and laughing and wish for our childhood to return? There definitely are many. The next question is how many of us would see a child in pain and move forward to help? I am sure the answer still is many. But what if the help required fighting against people of power and we could help only so much? Wouldn't you still try?

 “August 2012…

Woken in the wee hours of the morning, sleepy eyed and terrified, she moves silently to take orders. There are strangers around, commanding and punishing; there is no room for mistake. There is work to be done and this, is only early morning.

Her day starts with helping the arrogant, spoilt child of the house get ready for college. She is then summoned to the kitchen. Later, she sweeps the driveway, does the dishes, washes clothes, and cleans the house inside-out. Every single day.

This is Usha, domestic help to one of the giants of the marble and granite industry in the country. This is Usha, a 6 year old child.

Late September 2012…

The day moves at its usual lethargic pace. The chores done at Usha’s employers’ place are the same. Dusk replaces dawn and weeks replace days. Only, there is no sign of Usha. A new help has arrived at the household, a boy in his late teens.

What happened of Usha? Was she sent back to her parents, to school? Why was she taken away that suddenly? No harm could have befallen her, those people, though heartless are not cruel enough to hurt her. What caused this change?

It was one phone call.”

There exist millions of such oppressed children in our country, most of them in worse condition and to help them, a child helpline has been set up. Unfortunately for Usha, this helpline was of no help. There might be numerous cases throughout the country where the rescue team has turned up and rescued children from their miserable fate. But where was it when it received calls of complaint to help Usha?

Three weeks of continuous phone calls, complaints registered afresh each time a call was made, all in vain. The promises though, were made in plenty. The helpline assured that a team from the child welfare department would investigate the matter thoroughly and take to task the ruthless employers of Usha. There are two possible explanations for their inaction. First, the helpline did not take the complaint seriously. Or, the more probable explanation, the helpline team was under pressure not to act. Usha’s employer is a retired Superintendent of Police. There is every possibility that a tip off about the calls was made and hence they assured no action would be taken against them.

What does this go to show? Does it mean people in power have the right to snatch away the childhood of innocent children?  How Usha came to work for them is only a guess. For whatever reason she might have come, there came only misery out of it! The innocence that childhood possesses, once lost cannot come back. And once robbed, cannot be given back.

Usha was robbed of her innocence. No child of her age should carry a garbage can twice her size. No child should be made to work under the blazing sun while another child, way older, lazes around the house doing not even her own work. Books, toys and parents’ love is all that a child of that tender age desires.

She was moved out of the house she worked at, possibly to another of their houses, far from the watchful eyes of concerned neighbours. What fate has in store for Usha, fate alone knows. But the only regret is those who could have helped give her the chance to lead a life of dignity showed no interest. 

Welcome note to my readers…

Dear readers,

Welcome to my blog, Emotionally True. There is no end to reading, but there has to be a beginning to writing. So here I begin my journey of writing. This is going to be no diary entry of my daily activities, no journal of all the hot topics of discussion around the world, or a review of movies or fashion accessories. I intend to capture in words the innumerable happenings of the human mind and life, mine and of others’ and compel you readers to give thought to topics Emotionally True. I hope all of you enjoy my blog and appreciate the effort I will put into writing it. Comments are greatly appreciated.

Thank You,

Suhasini.